Searching For Something
by Yodes
Summary: She runs. She's done it for 11 years ever since she was 10 years old. Since there was nothing but grey walls, snow and a sister falling under the ice.


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Disclaimer: I don't own Jondy, and I don't own Dark Angel. If I did, do you honestly think the series would be cancelled without an Alec spin off?

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A/N: I'd like to say a big thank you to Roonblah for helping me out with this fic.

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Summary: She runs. She's done it for 11 years ever since she was 10 years old. Since there was nothing but grey walls, snow and a sister falling under the ice.

Rating: PG

Genre: General

Type: Standalone

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Searching For Something

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'And we've got to run

Deep through these forests

Or hang upon a hill

I've got a wish

Something to promise

But, no I never will'

-Four Star Mary (Run)

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She runs. There are many other names for what she does. To move on, to travel, to wander, to move about, to migrate, to journey. She prefers to run.

She's done it for 11 years ever since she was 10 years old. Since there was nothing but grey walls, snow and a sister falling under the ice.

She moves through the cities like a shadow, barely a glimmer in anyone's memory despite her looks and her unique abilities. The latter she hides and the other she changes to suit whatever person she decides to be next.

She's always looked the same even though no ordinary person would know it. She's been every colour there is. Red, blonde, fair, pink, dark, black, brown, light, blue.

She's been every kind of person there is. Shy and quiet. Loud and obnoxious. Angry. Scared. Bitchy. Conservative. Artistic.

She's had many names, so many that even with her enhanced genetics, she couldn't remember them all. She remembers the places though. Chicago. Atlanta. New Jersey. Philadelphia. Texas. Miami. California. Vegas. New York.

It doesn't matter where she is. It doesn't matter what colour her hair is, or how she acts. She is and always will be the same girl to the very few that knew her. They could see it in her eyes. Her cold blue eyes. Cold as ice.

~x~

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They were running, their feet flying over the snow-covered ground as the sirens wailed. They stick together, zigzagging through trees and over a fence, knowing instinctively where the other was going to go. They can hear their pursuers, the two of them had managed to gain some ground yet they don't let up their tortuous pace through the snow. Escape and evade. It used to be their favourite game.

Suddenly, their footing changes. The two girls don't falter; they continue at their high speed. They're over the lake, frozen ice beneath their feet. Slick, smooth, as cold as the rest of the place. That was when it happened. There was a crack behind her and the darker girl falls.

She spins around, inhumanly fast to see the flash of a blue smock and then she was staring into a hole in the ice.

Frantic, scared, her heart pounding in her ears, she drops to her knees at the edge of the hole and looks down into the murky depths.

"Max!" she yells and sees a dark shape move in the black water. She catches a glimpse of a pale face and dark eyes. Her sister's look says "run," but she doesn't move.

The sound of engines and dogs reach her. She looks up, they're almost here now. She stands, gives the ice one last look as the search lights fall on her and then she runs, escaping to the world outside of drills , grey walls and strategic lessons. Yet that night would haunt her forever. That night, the family she lost, the hell she used to call home and the sight of dark eyes, dark hair and a pale face staring up at her from beneath the ice.

~x~

Yes, those cold blue eyes tell a story. They tell the story of a girl named Jondy. They tell the story of a place she calls hell. A place she used to call home. She hasn't had a home since. She's tried, oh how she's tried, but it never works out. She becomes restless, unable to focus. Jondy can't seem to stay in one place long enough to figure out what it was about the place that she didn't like this time.

Sometimes, she sits on whatever high place she'd found in whatever city or town she was passing through and thinks about what she's doing.

Was she searching? Like so many of her brothers and sisters, who all seemed to know what is was they wanted?

Like Zane, who wanted to own his own garage, marry a girl and live in a place with a white picket fence? Or Tinga with her husband and kid? She was dead now. Or Ben and his quest to be a good soldier? He too was one of the fallen. Or Syl and Krit who just wanted to stay together? Or Brin and her dream to live by the ocean? She was dead also, lost to Manticore and it's own personal brand of torture.

So, there she sits, when she pauses in her running and thinks about why she does what she does. She wonders if they would all die in their quest for what it was they wanted. She wonders how Zane is doing in his mission to give a newly discovered Zack his memories back. She wonders if Tinga, Ben and Brin would do something different if they had the chance to live their lives again. She wonders why it had to be Eva to take the lead and ultimately get shot. She wonders if Krit and Syl are happy with their strange but highly enviable relationship. She wonders if Max made it out and maybe, just maybe that was what she was looking for. A sister lost.

She wonders if she'll ever stop running from her haunted past and uncertain future. 

She wonders if she'll ever find what it is she wants from her life. With each place she leaves, a hole somewhere inside of her gets larger, emptier and the only thing Jondy can do is move on again, always searching for whatever it is that she needs to find.

Sighing, Jondy leaves her high place for the night- one of the more derelict skyscrapers with it's hollow shell and empty floors. This one had had all of it's tinted glass swiped so anyone thinking of squatting there would probably die of hypothermia due to the strong winds that blasted through the unprotected floors. Jondy was indifferent. So long as she had her little bit of solitude from the world, she was happy to put up with a little wind chill. She jogs down the concrete stairwell and into the underground parking garage. She climbs onto her black motorcycle and drives out into the night, her head full of thoughts of death and isolation.

A few minutes later, Jondy absently searches for the packet of cherry flavoured gum she always kept with her, driving her motorcycle one handed. 

She curses silently when she realised she must've had the last piece earlier and comes to a stop outside of a convenience store.

Ignoring the whistles and looks she gets from several men, Jondy slides off her shades, puts them in a pocket and slides off her bike. She knows what she must look like. Blonde hair, angelic face and a body- all curves encased in leather. Jondy looks like a contradiction. Angelic beauty and tough bitch attitude. Jondy doesn't care. Looks mean nothing to her.

She passes the window of a TV shop, people crowded around its window watching the flickering screens inside and something makes her pause. Over their heads she sees something. Something that takes her breath away and makes her stare in shock.

The first thing she sees is a flag. Red, white and black. A white dove flying through the colours and over a barcode. That flickering flag touches something in her and Jondy rubs her neck. The second thing she sees is someone who looks so familiar that she couldn't be anyone else. Dark hair, dark chocolate eyes. She'd know those eyes anywhere. She sees her dead sister Max.

A phone rings, snapping her out of her daze and Jondy pulls out her cell phone.

"Did you see it?" the male voice on the other end of the line doesn't even give a greeting.

"Yeah." Jondy's eyes remained on the screen, oblivious to all around her but the face of her long lost sister.

"We're all going." the voice was warm, excited.

"Meet you there, Zane" Jondy hangs up and stares at the TV screen. Giving her sister one last look, she moves away from the crowd, her mind reeling. Walking back over to her motorcycle, Jondy climbs on, sits still for a second, a look of shock on her face and then slides on her shades again and smiles. Something inside of her feels like it's going to burst. There's no more hole where a part of her should be. There's no more emptiness inside. Jondy's finally found what she was searching for and now it's time to move on. Jondy grabs her duffel bag from her apartment, says goodbye to New York City and moves on.

She runs. She's done it for 11 years ever since she was 10 years old. Since there was nothing but grey walls, snow and a sister falling under the ice. Only this time, she's running home. 


End file.
